“Sleep Divorce” could be the trick for saving relationships

 “Sleep Divorce” could be the trick for saving relationships

In your marriage or in your relationship, sharing a bed with someone isn’t as romantic as it seems in movies. Let’s be honest. We all have times where our sleep is negatively affected by our partners. If it only happens once in a while, most of us will be fine with it. What if it is something that occurs every single night?

What is a ‘sleep divorce’?

First of all, ‘Sleep Divorce‘ is a trend where loving couples sleep in separate beds or bedrooms. It’s an awful name but doesn’t actually mean that they’re destined for divorce, but sleep divorce actually refers to couples who really do love each other, and they want to maintain a really happy and positive outlook. Consistent quality sleep is important for our health and well-being, and if you’re not getting enough sleep, you’re likely struggling in ways you may not even realize. Partner disturbance on bed could trigger a lot of arguments and unpleasant. Here are 5 reasons why you should consider a ‘sleep divorce’.

1) Different sleep schedules

Difference in bed time often create disturbance to the other half. If one is an early bird and the other half is a night owl, there might cause a lot of conflicts. One might work night shift and one works early hours in the morning. Respecting and understanding the other half’s sleep becomes extremely important but sometimes you can’t help but drop your breakfast plate on the floor!

2) Partner Disturbance

Even you manage to agree to go to bed at the same time. It doesn’t mean the problem is solved. 3 out of 10 women report that their partner has a negative effect on their sleep quality. The most common complaint being loud snoring and the second most common is restless partners. As we get older, we will find ourselves needing to go to the bathroom more frequently during the night. If your partner is a light sleeper, be extremely mindful and try not to create too much noise.

3) Different Sleep environment preferences

Now you agree going to bed at the same time, your mattress is completely dead on motion transfer. You even manage to fix your snoring problem but have you thought about this? One likes a firm mattress and the other half likes a softer one. One loves to leave the lights on or with the TV on during the night. One prefers dead silence and complete darkness. One might prefer the room breezing cool and the other one likes the heater one and an electric blanket and the heaviest warmest doona in the universe. You get the picture. There will be a lot of “Have you ever thought about me?” moment. Sometimes sleeping in the same environment just doesn’t work.

4) Different sleep habits

Same as sleep environment preferences, we are just not built the same. We like to do different things on bed in a different time as well. One might be playing with the phone on bed with sounds on and lights from the monitor keeping the other one awake. One might like to read for 10-15 minutes after that prefer a dead silent dark room.

5) Co-sleeping conflicts

If you are old enough to have the ‘privilege’ of sharing a bed with different individuals, you might experience some kung-fu masters, sleep-talkers (I call them sleep lecturer), Blanket Thief, High powered noise generator. You name it. Some parents just don’t sleep very well at night especially with their kids on the same bed. (Some people are able to cope with random elbows and knees digging into their soft tissue courtesy of restless toddlers much better than others)

Last but also the most important

Don’t place blame on your partner. I am sure if they have a choice. They will respect your sleep but we just can’t control our snoring can we? Mention how your sleeping arrangement might be impacting both of you. Try to get your other half acknowledge the difference in sleeping style between you two. After that, suggest if he/she is open to try new things and mention you only bring up the idea of sleeping separately merely because you care deeply about other’s well-being.

 

So there you have it. Be honest and open with your partner. Communication is always the key. If you are looking for a mattress that both of you are happy with, why not try our super useful mattress selector (https://www.rnbbedding.com.au/mattress-selector/). It might not be the answer but it is a start.


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